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“Men are still seen as ’bachelors,’ but women are ’old maids.’ People even start questioning your sexual preference if you aren’t married. “ The End of Saturday Night Fever ROGER ALBRIGHT, 43, A DALLAS ATTORNEY WHO HAS NEVER BEEN married, believes it’s more common now than ever for people to stay single into their 30s and 40s.
But he acknowledges that many people, especially married people, do think there’s something wrong with anyone who reaches their 40s without marrying.
If every date has to be the man you are going to marry, it puts too much pressure on him and on you.” It’s easy to find those unspoiled dates when you’re younger, when background is simply where you grew up and where you went to college.
But as we get older, all of our stories get too long and our baggage too heavy.
” Relationships are a journey without a destination.
If you are focused on an end point, whether that’s marriage or a commitment or children, that becomes all-consuming.
Using his own anecdotal evidence, Albright maintains that the growing number of never-marrieds is a Yuppie phenomenon and a sign of the times.
But as we grow older, those standards can harden into impenetrable and unrealistic barriers that screen out all but the non-existent Mr. “You can be guilty of setting your expectations too high,” says Lisa Le Master, 41, president of Fairchild Le Master Oppel, a media training and crisis communications firm, “and that’s a quick way to find yourself alone.At the first sight of white crew socks and short shorts, Stephanie knew she was in for a pretty bad evening.Her date told her to knock herself out and order anything on the menu.I realized I could skip one and not be afraid that I would miss somebody,” Albright says.“It is just not as important to me now to have something to do on Saturday night,” Crosskno says.