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Although I had no intention of introducing any of these casual dates to my son, the fact I am a parent did make me feel differently about whom I was choosing to spend time with. I’m sure anyone who has tried online dating has come across the married people, or the guys who are actually a foot shorter, 10 years older and 3st heavier than their profile suggests.Even if all that happened was a no-strings fling, I was still more interested in what they were like as people – did they have ambition? Well, it turns out there is a whole other layer of disappointment that someone in my position has to deal with.Now when I spot the word ‘spontaneous’ in a man’s dating profile, I swipe left.
At first, it seemed exciting creating profiles on and Plenty of Fish and immediately getting loads of messages.Things with Jack unfortunately fizzled out after a year or so – he was having a second youth of constant holidays and weekend breaks that I just couldn’t join in on, as much as I loved his approach to life.And while I obviously ditched the dating sites while I was seeing Jack, I’m now on the verge of reactivating my profiles.Then there was the guy who wouldn’t accept that I’m only free every other weekend and wanted to come round to my house once my son was asleep.Aside from the obvious safety issues, nobody expects child-free, single women to be happy with dates in their own living room, so why should I settle for that?
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That’s another part of hook-ups I’ve found difficult – someone who isn’t the father of my child (and therefore has no obligation to be kind) seeing my body.